Hi, Bonjour!
There’s something really peculiar about a birthday. You get overly reflective, unsuspected dm’s from old friends, and dread the feeling of turning older. I think last year when I turned 25 I felt this sense of longing for a much simpler time, I mourn the adolescent that I thought I was. But as the year went on I noticed how much I grew as an adult. I had so much more free time to create and play. I discovered new hobbies and rekindled old ones. And so maybe turning 25 isn’t as scary as one makes it out to be. It’s scary because now, you are a quarter of your life. But also you’ve survived a quarter of said life. You have so much more life to live for. So in this week's newsletter, I’ll list 6 things I took from turning 25 that I will be bringing into this year as a 26 year old.
Books
Of course, this is my first point, if you didn’t know already. I love books and I love to read. I have never been a huge reader. Growing up with dyslexia and struggling with words and basic comprehension as a kid. Truly, killed any love for reading I would have had as a kid. I turned to graphic novels, comics, and manga. I can understand pictures. But reading words on a page was solely for school purposes. In 2023, a friend bullied me into listening to the "A Court of Thorns and Rose" dramatized audiobooks and I've never been the same. In 2024, I read up to 80 books and I haven't stopped. Reading someone’s writing is so inspirational, it feels like I’m enriching my own pool of knowledge, it also helps that part of my brain know what to create.
Friendship
The work I put into my friendships is a full-time job. Sort of like a plant, if you don't give it attention, sunlight, water, or fertilizer it will wilt and die. Some are more high-maintenance and others are super chill. But I love all of them. I made an effort last year when I was laid off to keep in contact with a coworker, I spoke to her every day, and she had essentially become a friend. I was scared that I would go every day without seeing her. We lived close by and I love going on walks. So I asked her if she would want to meet up once a week to go on an hour walk and talk about everything from being unemployed to projects we are working on, opportunities, and books. In December, she moved away from my neighbourhood, practically across the city. But we didn’t give up. It's been 6 months and we haven't given up on this routine. There’s truly nothing more beautiful about a female friendship. It’s about showing up for each other even when it's complicated or inconvenient
Hobbies I’m not good at
Sometimes, you're not going to be good at something and that's okay. For me that was crochet. As a self-imposed perfectionist and an impatient creative. Crocheting has been my undoing. Discovering this hobby however has been the most fun I've had in a long time. Since forever art and drawing have always been my go-to when I would have some downtime. But when that same hobby becomes your career, it becomes work. You find yourself avoiding it at all costs. Taking up a hobby that you're not good at keeps you humble but also motivates you to pick it up when you are bored. I’ve made gifts and attempted to make clothing. It’s all bad but it's not like I’m monetizing this. It is only for myself and occasionally friends and family.
Romanticize EVERYTHING
There's something about taking in and enjoying the small things in life. We live in a time that is uncertain and stressful. But at least I can wake up in the morning and treat myself, go on walks, listen to the birds, grab a coffee, hang out with friends, and create art for a living. Maybe it's because I’m an artist, or maybe it's my piece of sun, seeing the world in all its intricacies, and being grateful for the space you live in. It’s as simple as waking up and taking in the sun! or dancing around in your room.
Easy habits
One of the biggest struggles of adulthood is the lack of routine, especially as someone who is freelancing. There’s more downtime than actual work time. And you need to be disciplined enough to create habits that will keep you motivated to keep going. Instead of creating unattainable goals. Set easier habits that get you excited to do them. For me, I really struggled with working out, doing it for a week then giving up for 2 months. I started small, stepping outside and exploring the waterfront near my house, and turned it into daily hour-long walks in the morning. Every time I did it I felt so good. I dictated my entire morning. After 3 months of doing it constantly, I wanted to start implementing a workout routine. For me that looked like working out before my walks, 4 times a week. Making sure I end my workout with my walks. Because it was already solidified in my routine to walk. If I didn't end up doing it it would kill my mood for the rest of the day. Planning a workout before a walk helped solidify that habit, eventually turning that habit into a daily routine.
Learn to create again.
As an artist you should always strive to create. Last year I spent a lot of time discovering what I enjoyed creating. In art school, to find work you need to be as marketable as possible, while still having your own creative flair. In animation, you need to be able to fit whatever style is required for the show. Somewhere along the way, you lose a sense of your own personal style. Sure I’m able to create beautiful landscape drawings and create a moody scene perfect for concept art. But nobody really knows me? Who is Kiara and what is her style? Social media is no help for this, being constantly fed new ideas and new avenues to take my work has overwhelmed my creative flow. Learning that you may be a multi-passionate creative person. How do I adapt? How do I make it my own? I’m still figuring this out. Being critical of my own work is hard. I hope to find my own creative flair in the upcoming year. In the meantime, sharing my work with others,talking and discussing it with others. Art can be such an interpersonal career, and I’ve always been a lurker. Lately, I’ve tried taking action, being the first to start a discussion and being invested in others' work. To me growing a community is way more important than the views and likes, chatting with others getting excited about this collective community.
Something fun about having a March birthday is that it's still quite early in the year, not so early that people forget it's your birthday because it's not in competition with holidays, but not so late that a whole year has gone by. I get to be reflective and opportunities seem so endless since the year has just begun. So who knows what 26 is going to look like. Taking a step back and reflecting on the past year, let things come my way. I am open to new discoveries and challenging myself to be open and embrace this year as it is.
Bisou, Bisou ♡
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The part about romanticizing life even if everything is burning really hit home, I've been on a rush ever since I started teaching at a new school and it's been so sad to think about wanting the next day to come fast so I can rest, but finding little things to feel good about and give meaning to every day is really keeping me sane and happy! Also! The habits! As an autistic person I struggle a lot with changing routines and working out had been just impossible but exactly as you said, starting slow (and actually going outside to do it) is like the best thing ever! I love my morning walks 💕✨️
I love this post Kiara! It always blows my mind when I come across people who pretty much have a similar life/thoughts/experiences like me. I’m 26 and your 6 things pretty much sum up my life. I did not read as a kid too, it was more of an academic environment for me, even at school. I stepped into the magical world of books only after college and I haven’t stopped discovering life changing books and friendship is not my strongest suit in my 20s. As a kid I had SO many friends, I was that one girl who was friends with almost everyone but towards the end of school and college I suffered severe anxiety and kind of fell into a void and lost touch with almost everyone. The past few years I did gather courage and make friends through friend making apps( which was actually a success because I did make 2 good friends on it) but then they moved countries. I do have friends now virtually from different countries /cities. We meet every week on zoom to just chat/sketch. In the process of finding friends I have become more closer with myself haha, I can now spend weeks/months just with my dog. And like you say, late twenties feel more liberating to me it’s like there’s no one there to judge what you do with your time more and I’m actually loving this age of experimenting/travelling/taking risk and just living life one day at a time. Before I rant more, let me end this comment by saying this is such a beautiful post and beautiful artwork!